Becoming unfuckwithable

A client recently told me that I should promote myself as a superhero called “The Shame-Shifter”. I had to laugh because what does that costume even look like? (I hope she gets an invisible plane so I can jet over to paradise island and hang out with those sexy amazons…)

Seriously though, this man came to me as many clients do - at a crossroads in his life, filled with anxiety about what to do next. His mind was racing with a seemingly endless stream of potential scenarios, most of them featuring all the ways he will inevitably screw it all up. Shame is sneaky. It’s fear in a trench coat, keeping you small, stuck and second-guessing every decision. In our sessions together we walked to a place where he could radically accept the truth of his experience, cleared up some old limiting beliefs that were in his way and suddenly the path forward was clear to him. His naturally creative resources were no longer shrouded in self-doubt.

The thing is, my clients don’t need me to tell them how to change - they already have all the tools they need. My job is to help them ditch the shame and fear that’s fogging up their path and replace it with love. We all have untapped power that can be self-resourced and I believe that type of healing happens through self-validation. Imagine waking up every morning with an unshakable sense of ease and inner calm. You trust yourself. You know you’re capable, no matter what life throws at you. That’s being unfuckwithable. It’s not that life stops being challenging, it’s that you stop questioning whether or not you can handle it.

When you stop being a victim to circumstances and start owning your authentic experience, something magical happens: you become the source of your own love and validation. Your cup fills up. The real magic happens when you start to validate your own experiences. No waiting for external permission or approval. Healing begins when you accept that your experience is yours—and it’s enough.

I teach my clients to self-resource. To tap into their own inner strength and wisdom, even when the world feels overwhelming and even when we make mistakes. It’s not about pretending life is perfect; it’s about turning that inner critic into a tenacious creator with unshakable self-worth.